chapter 4

1.
1.

Murphy
Today is the day. Today I make a sale. Someone will want a car today. It’s a beautiful day to buy a car. It’s a beautiful day to buy a car from me. It’s a beautiful day for commission. My charm is on. My suit is immaculate. A bit hot, should I take off the coat? No, I can sacrifice comfort for a sale. Sale sale sale. I have to make a sale. If I don’t make a sale today I will be commissionless during my probation period. I’ll probably get fired. And I know it’s not long before my wife goes from saying things like, “It’s OK, it takes time, before long you’ll be the best salesman they have”, to things like, “I married the wrong man, an ambitionless loser incapable of selling a single car in ninety days on the job.” Then she’ll divorce me. Then I’ll be unemployed and divorced. And there’s Handley looking at me. He’s laughing, he seems to be quite the jerk, I’ll never outsell him though, I just wish…oh, customer here. Friendly smile in place and go.

Handley
You are a shark Handley, unstoppable in the car lot and at the poker table. Such a shark. Leading salesman for the first quarter, surprise surprise. Murphy still hasn’t made a one. Hahaha. Stupid schmuck. College boy thinks he can outsell the master. He couldn’t sell ice to Eskimos. I shouldn’t have drank so much last night…how bout some hair of the dog. *pulls flask from coat pocket* Oh that’s good. Murphy looks a little hot in his coat. Sweating a bit, why doesn’t he take off his jacket? Because he’s an idiot, and not a shark. As for the shark he is going to take off his jacket, even loosen the tie a bit, there we go. OK Handley, make a sale today and you’ll have the district lead at the close of the quarter. And that’s a bonus. And that’s a speedboat. Murphy’s getting up, customer’s here, time to go get my speedboat.

2.

Murphy: Hello Miss. Can I help you with anything?
customer: Yeah I’d like to test drive this I think.
Handley: *arriving at the scene*Can I help you with anything Miss?
customer: Ummm, yeah, I’d like to test drive this one.
Handley: Oh it’s an excellent car, good choice, I’ll grab the keys.
Murphy: Yes it’s a great car, I’ll get the keys.
*Murphy and Handley start towards the building for the key, following exchange continues during collection of key, and stroll back towards customer and car*
Murphy: That’s my sale Handley.
Handley: How do you figure Murphy?
Murphy: Because I got there first. That’s the rule. We all know that.
Handley: It looked like you were struggling, thought I needed to pick up the slack.
Murphy: *shocked* What?! I just got there. Asked her one question.
Handley: Yeah, and you were screwing it up. So I saved the sale.
Murphy: You said the same thing to her I did.
Handley: Yeah, but I said it with poise and charm.
Murphy: No, you said it with bourbon on your tie.
*back at customer*
Handley: Here you go miss. I’ll just step in with you.
Murphy: Yeah I’ll go for the ride too.
customer: o ok.
*they all get in the car, Murphy has to settle for the backseat*